My New Decade Resolution | 2020

At the end of 2009, my resolution for the coming year was fairly simple. “I want to make my life excellent,” I said to the camera, sitting there well after midnight at an IHOP. At twenty years old, I had a limitless supply of optimism pumping through my veins. I was woefully cocky, endlessly energetic, unceasingly hopeful—and incredibly selfish. I still am, more often than I’d like to be, but I’m working on it.

By definition, New Year’s resolutions are about yourself. According to Wikipedia, they are promises that people make “to change an undesired trait or behavior, to accomplish a personal goal or otherwise improve their life.” Self-improvement, self-esteem, self-growth—these words appear in resolutions ad nauseam. People tend to read more self-help books every time January rolls around. They vow to practice self-love and increase their self-respect. No doubt, it’s important to set goals and take care of yourself. Setting and sticking to New Year’s resolutions has helped me achieve many things over the years—from releasing 28+ songs with my band and solo project to writing my first novel. I love setting and accomplishing yearly goals, but this year I want to try something different. 

Big goals require big timelines, and the goal I’m setting today is among the biggest undertakings that one could hope to achieve. It will take trial and error. I’ll have to learn many lessons, take countless small steps. This goal will require time—a decade perhaps—and it might actually be impossible, but I have to try.

I still have the same drive to make my life excellent that I did at twenty years old. Who doesn’t want an excellent life? With the right planning, I know I will accomplish some great things in the next ten years, but these goals are not my resolution. My resolution for the 2020s sounds simple, but it’s not. Today, on January 1st, 2020, I resolve to learn to love others as much as I love myself—not temporarily, not conditionally, but permanently and consistently.

There is one caveat to this idea. Loving others isn’t entirely selfless…because it’s the greatest thing you can do for yourself.

If you liked this blog post, you’ll love this video rendition of one of my favorite short stories, The Egg by Andy Weir. Happy New Year—to my friends, to my family, and to everyone who will become friends or family. I love you!